THE CHAPERONES (version 2)
By Dwayne Yancey
Copyright 2004; all rights reserved.
(There are two versions of this script Version 1 has the female teacher as the uptight chaperone, Version 2 puts the male teacher in that role.)
(The chaperone table at the prom. A teacher, Miss Speedwell is sitting down, very relaxed, as she surveys the dance crowd. Another teacher, Mr. Lester enters, in a huff. Hes uptight about everything.)
MISS SPEEDWELL: So what was the matter?
MR. LESTER: Smoking! Girls, too, apparently.
MISS SPEEDWELL: So did you catch them?
MR. LESTER: No. They slipped away from me.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Thats one thing thats different. In my day, it would have just been the boys that were smoking at the prom.
MR. LESTER: I think it was that Kristin girl but I cant prove it.
MISS SPEEDWELL: The one in the blue dress?
MR. LESTER: If you call that a dress. Just look at her. On second thought, no, dont look at her. Its not decent. I cant believe her parents let her out of the house dressed like that. (Pause) Wonder what keeps her corsage on?
MISS SPEEDWELL: So wheres your corsage?
MR. LESTER (momentarily distracted): What? Oh. I didnt bother to get one. Too much trouble. (Focusing again on the assigned task.) So did you keep your eye on the punch bowl like I told you too?
MISS SPEEDWELL (unconvincingly): Yeah.
MR. LESTER: But did you keep your eye on it?
MISS SPEEDWELL: The punch bowl is fine, Mr. Lester.
MR. LESTER: Because you know some of those boys will try to spike it. Theyre like that you know, Miss Speedwell.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Nobodys going to spike the punch bowl.
MR. LESTER: They spiked the punch bowl at my prom.
MISS SPEEDWELL: And what happened?
MR. LESTER: I dont know. I wasnt there.
MISS SPEEDWELL: What do you mean, you werent there?
MR. LESTER: Just what I said. I wasnt there.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Why didnt you go to your prom?
MR. LESTER: Because.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Because why?
MR. LESTER: Just keep an eye on that punch bowl, OK? Youve got to take this chaperone job seriously.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Im taking it serious. But I dont think the punch bowl is in any danger.
MR. LESTER: I wouldnt have had any fun anyway.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Fun where?
MR. LESTER: At my prom. All those flashing lights and stuff theyd make my head hurt.
MISS SPEEDWELL: I thought you said you didnt go?
MR. LESTER: I was on the decorating committee. I put up the bunting and then I went home.
MISS SPEEDWELL: You didnt have a date?
MR. LESTER: I didnt want to go anyway. Now look at that isnt that just disgusting?
MISS SPEEDWELL: What? Its just dancing.
MR. LESTER: You call that dancing? It looks more like theyre you know. Oh! Arent you going to go out and make them stop?
MISS SPEEDWELL: Relax. Theyre enjoying themselves.
MR. LESTER: Hes certainly enjoying himself, thats for sure.
MISS SPEEDWELL: If you crack down on them, theyll just leave and go get in trouble somewhere else. And we dont want that.
MR. LESTER: At least then we wouldnt have to sit here and listen to that awful music. How do they stand that?
MISS SPEEDWELL: Its the fashion nowadays. Im sure its no worse than some of the music we had to dance to in our day.
MR. LESTER: I never did like dancing.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Youve never been dancing?
MR. LESTER: I didnt say that.
MISS SPEEDWELL: I know, but have you ever been dancing?
MR. LESTER: I dont see why it matters.
MISS SPEEDWELL: I just asked a simple question: have you ever been to a dance?
MR. LESTER: No.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Never?
MR. LESTER: I dont see what the big deal is. Now look theyre blocking the view of the punch bowl.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Theyre just lining up for a drink. Relax.
MR. LESTER: Or crowding around it so they can spike it.
MISS SPEEDWELL (toying with him): Do you really think so?
MR. LESTER: Oh, Im sure of it. Ive got some of those boys in class and I know theyre up to no good.
MISS SPEEDWELL (she motions for him to join her): Come on.
MR. LESTER: Where are you going?
MISS SPEEDWELL: Im going out on the dance floor.
MR. LESTER: But why? To check on the punch bowl?
MISS SPEEDWELL: To dance, why else? . . . Come on . . .
(She reaches out for his hand.)
MR. LESTER: Oh no, not me. Not me. I told you, I dont dance.
MISS SPEEDWELL: I dont dance, either, but come on. Itll be fun.
MR. LESTER: I dont see whats fun about it.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Come on, just this one time.
MR. LESTER: But people will stare. Theyll laugh at us. Theyll laugh at me.
MISS SPEEDWELL: The kids? Theyre too busy with each other to pay attention to a bunch of old teachers.
MR. LESTER: Well, I dont know I cant dance to all that hippy-hop music.
MISS SPEEDWELL: Listen. Theyre getting ready to play a slow one. You can dance to that.
MR. LESTER: A slow one? Oh no no no!
MISS SPEEDWELL: Come on, the lights are down. No one will see.
MR. LESTER: Well, I, I dont know. Wait a minute the punch bowl! If the lights are down, somebody might
MISS SPEEDWELL: All the more reason then. If were dancing, you can get a closer look at the punch bowl that way. OK?
MR. LESTER: Well, OK. But just this one song . . .
(He takes her hand and they exit to the dance floor.)
------- THE END ----------
Cast of two one male, one female
Mr. Lester, a male chaperone at the prom
Miss Speedwell, his female counterpart
Set: A table and chairs
1791 Mount Pleasant Church Road
Fincastle, VA 24090
Days: 540 981 3113
Nights: 540 473 3313
E-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org or email@example.com
Website: www.storyfoundry.com, search under "playwrights"THIS SCRIPT IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR