THE THREE NOT-SO-WISE MEN
By Dwayne Yancey
Copyright 2003; all rights reserved.
(Two men, Merle and Billy, are sleeping around a dying campfire. Eddie is awake, and looking up at the sky. Theyre farmers who have been out hunting coyotes.)
EDDIE: Merle, you still awake?
EDDIE: Merle, wake up.
EDDIE: Merle, quick, theres something you gotta look at.
MERLE: What? I was almost asleep.
EDDIE: Theres something you gotta see.
MERLE: Cant it wait til morning?
EDDIE: No! Look up there!
MERLE: Look up where?
EDDIE: In the sky!
MERLE: I dont see a thing.
EDDIE: Youve got your hat over your eyes.
MERLE: I thought it was kinda dark.
EDDIE: Well, it is dark. Its nighttime. But look up there. What do you see?
MERLE: Um, stars.
EDDIE: Yeah, but what about that really bright one?
MERLE: What about it?
EDDIE: Its pretty bright, dont you think?
MERLE: Yeah, so?
EDDIE: Well, it just seems brighter than the other stars.
MERLE: You woke me up just for that? You idiot, I ought to knock you so flat that you
d be seeing stars, for sure. Now let me go back to sleep.
EDDIE: Its just weird, you know? Ive never seen a star that bright before.
MERLE: Look, some stars are brighter than others. Thats just the way they are. The brighter they are, the closer they are to earth. Now let me go back to sleep.
EDDIE: Actually, thats not true.
MERLE: Whats not true?
EDDIE: What you just said.
MERLE: What did I just say?
EDDIE: That the brighter ones are close to earth. Actually, some of the brightest ones are pretty far away.
MERLE: OK, fine, youre an astrology expert now. You figure it out and let me go back to sleep, OK?
EDDIE: Actually its astronomy. Astrology is that stuff they do in horoscopes.
MERLE: Whatever. Just let me sleep, OK? If you hear a coyote, then you can wake me up. Thats what we came out here for to keep the coyotes away from the sheep.
EDDIE: Sorry. Its just I havent seen a star like that before.
MERLE: Well, maybe its not a star at all.
MERLE: Maybe its an airplane.
EDDIE: Its not moving.
MERLE: Maybe its a satellite then.
EDDIE: Its still not moving.
MERLE: Well, I dont know then, maybe its a planet or something. Now, please, just let me
EDDIE: Its not a planet.
MERLE: How can you be so sure?
EDDIE: Well, because Venus has already set, and Mars is over there, and Jupiter hasnt come up yet and Saturn isnt that bright what? Its here in the almanac.
MERLE: Well, if you know so much, why are you asking me?
EDDIE: Dont be so touchy. I just thought you might know.
MERLE: Well, I dont, OK? Now let me
EDDIE: All right, all right, Ill let you get back to sleep.
MERLE: Thank you.
(Merle lays down. Theres a pause.)
EDDIE: It could be a supernova.
MERLE: A super-what?
EDDIE: A supernova. A star thats blown up.
MERLE: Well, there you go then.
EDDIE: A supernova. Now that would really be something.
(Billy begins to wake up.)
EDDIE: Billy, are you awake?
EDDIE: I said, are you awake? Or are you asleep?
EDDIE: No, youre awake, or no, youre asleep?
MERLE: Good Lord, Eddie, no means no!
EDDIE: But it could have been either one well, it could have been.
BILLY: Whats going on?
EDDIE: You see that star up there? The really bright one?
EDDIE: You ever seen it there before?
EDDIE: So what do you think it is?
BILLY: Oh, thats easy.
EDDIE: It is?
EDDIE: What is it then?
BILLY: Its a sign from God.
EDDIE: Oh, dont be ridiculous.
BILLY: Well, you asked.
(Billy goes back to sleep. Eddie looks up in the sky.)
EDDIE: It could be one of them, whatcha call, pulsating stars. Pulsars, they call em. Not Quasar. Thats like the TV set. Yep, I betcha anything its a pulsar.
-------------- THE END -----------------
CAST OF CHARACTERS
Merle, whos trying to sleep
Eddie, whos awake
Billy, who does sleep through most of itTHIS SCRIPT IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR