copyright © 2004 Mike Rothschild

"Angry Scotsman"

By Mike Rothschild

LIGHTS UP on Carl, an angry Scotsman holding a beer.

Carl

Awright then, ya fuckin' cunts. I'm here tae talk about something that's fuckin' making' me angry, an' ah want tae do something about it. Likesay these specky cunts in Washington want ta pass an Amendment whae say I cannae get married! Thae want ta stick their beaks into my business and tell me whae I can and can't get married to? Bollocks that! I dae what I want, when I want and to who I want. And if you poofs in Congress can't get that through your little heids, then fuck the lot of ye. I'm Scottish and we marry whoever we damn well please. Nae Amendment that any country full of cunts passes will stop a lad and a lass from being married in the eyes of God. And the president is the biggest arsehole of all...

MAN enters.

Man

Look, they want to ban GAY marriage, not GAELIC marriage.

CARL

Oh. Well that's fuckin' stupid too.

BLACKOUT

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