MONSTER TRUCK

By Todd Ristau

CLINTON: I am a truck. I used to be a run of the mill ordinary truck but now I’m special. Now I’m a Monster.

CROWD: KILL KILL KILL KILL!!!!

CLINTON: In 1979 a Chevrolet powered pick up truck with huge 66" Goodyear tires was born - only the 2nd Monster Truck to ever be built since Bob Chandler developed BIGFOOT back in 1974.

CROWD: SMASH SMASH SMASH

CLINTON: I was once a 1976 Dodge Pick Up Truck with a Slant Six engine and a three in the tree transmission, with three different colors of green on the body and a wooden rear bumper!

CROWD: KILL KILL KILL KILL

CLINTON: Now I have tires that are six feet across, I have 5 ton military axels, a super charged 557ci Chevy engine and weigh 18,000 pounds unloaded!

CROWD: SMASH SMASH SMASH!!!!

CLINTON: I have nitrogen shocks, I can jump 12 cars and the impressive weight of the statement I make can crush an ordinary sedan to the shape of a pancake!

CROWD: KILL KILL KILL KILL

CLINTON: And now, I will attempt to jump (insert number of writers here) writers.

(The writers all come down and lie on the floor, Clinton to the sound of the chants of KILL KILL KILL rolls back and gets ready to run at the writers but the lights black out before he can.)

End of piece

"Monster Truck" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR

November 29, 2002 - No Shame Charlottesville

Performed by Clinton Johnston, with the help of the crowd and nine writers.

January 9, 2003 - No Shame Miami

Performed by C.J.

March 27, 2003 - Best of No Shame (Charlottesville)

December 3, 2004 - No Shame Roanoke

Performed by Todd Ristau and Randy Brinkley, John Brill, Ashlee Mitchell, Christina Smith, Connie Sellers, Dwayne Yancey, Sam Fochtmann, Improv Train Wreck, Mike Allen, Carly Huffman, Shane Pendleton, David Cheresnowsky, and Shirl Sazynski

[Todd Ristau's website] [Ristau Entertainment Ltd.]

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