copyright © 2002 / 2005 Jonathan Price (music) / Jeff Goode (lyrics)

No Shame Theatre Song

(Awkward Desperation version)

music by Jonathan Price

lyrics by Jeff Goode

There's nothing like a blowjob to start off a Friday night
It gets the juices flowing and it sets the mood just right.

It's good to make performers feel relaxed as they can be.
And since I'm here already, well, I guess we'll start with me.

No Shame Theatre
There's no need to fear.
No Shame Theatre
I need a volunteer!
(spoken:)...Or a woman? Ladies?

I guess the evening isn't starting quite like I had hoped.
I really thought I had a chance, at least, of getting groped.

And now I guess I understand, how Michael Jackson felt.
He used his hands! ...(awkward pause as the music continues)
(spoken:) ...that's how he felt.

No Shame Theatre
Now ...I'm just embarrassed.
No Shame Theatre
And totally un-carressed.
So let me start the show instead with this apology.
If I, at times, seem desperate. ...Well, folks, it's not just me.

You're bound to see some desperation played out here tonight.
But next time could you give them some applause to be polite.

No Shame Theatre
If we bomb it's suicide.
No Shame Theatre
No Shame Don't Mean No Pride
"No Shame Theatre Song" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR
AUTHOR'S NOTES (Goode):
I knew there was a slight chance that someone might actually volunteer when I asked for a volunteer. So the plan was to humiliate them back off of the stage before going on, since the song obviously couldn't proceed without the awkward moment of not having a volunteer.

Unfortunately, Ellen Rae Littman gamely came up on stage, but not until after I had already started the next verse, and I wasn't sure what to do at that point. So I let her stand their awkwardly - which I guess was appropriate - and eventually she did leave the stage. But God bless her for tryin'.

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