for No Shame Theatre

by Lee Moyer

8/3/2001

The modern news media has become so used editing the product it produces, that it has wrung all the spontaneity out of the evening news. Here then is an attempt to put some of that good clean fun back where it belongs. In all your living rooms.

I have here some words that I’d like to pass into the audience. When I indicate you, please stand-up and (using the words provided, and any other words you’d like to add), give me your account of what you witnessed…

______________________________________________________

Hello Ted.

Marvin F. Error here. I’m here in the Ginza, normally the scene of Japanese commerce writ large. Today though, all the normal activities that a visitor like myself would come to Tokyo to enjoy have been suddenly suspended.

I don’t know how much you can see for yourself from back in the studio Ted, but the scene before me is almost indescribable. You may remember my report from the scene of the LA riots in 1992. This scene is far, far worse. Smoke, Fire, Explosions, Spinning High Tension Wires. It’s amazing…

(Reporter looks around distractedly)

I’m trapped here between in the remnants of a San Rio Gift store and a small bus shelter with several other bystanders. Perhaps they’ll tell you what they saw…

Sir, may I ask you why you came to the Ginza this afternoon and what you observed?

MASSAGE PARLOR

CRASH

Ma’am, what did you see?

NAPPING

LOOTERS

BUS

Sir, can you tell me what you witnessed here today?

GREEN

SPARE

FLAT

Miss, excuse me. Can you tell me what transpired here?

REVENGE

TURTLE

GLAD

I think the witnesses here have said all that need be said Ted.

This is Marvin f. Error signing off…