copyright © 2003 Scott McGee

Canti Una Canzone Di Scopata

by Scott McGee

A couple sitting at a table.

Woman: Steve, this place is so romantic.

Man: Yeah, it’s pretty cool.

Woman: How did you find it? It’s so out of the way.

Man: Tony at the office told me about it.

Woman: Well, it’s very nice here.
Man: Yeah, and parking was pretty good too. (notices waiter standing at table) Hello. (pause) Hello.

Waiter: Ciao.

Woman: Ciao.

Waiter: I wish for to sing song of love for the lovers.
Woman: Oh, that would be so nice.

Man: Sure.

Woman: How romantic.

Waiter: This is for the lovers tonight. (Sings loud and brash)

Oh this is the night, what a beautiful night

And they call it Bella Notte.

Look at the skies, they have stars in their eyes

On this lovely Bella Notte.

Side by side with your loved ones, you’ll find enchantment here.

The night will weave its magic spell

When the one you love is near.

Oh, this is the night, And the heavens are bright

On this lovely Bella Notte.

I kiss you. I kiss you. (Kisses woman)

I kiss you. I kiss you. (Kisses man)

(Manager enters)

Waiter: Grazie. Grazie. (exits)

Man: You know, I think you need to tell your singers to take it a little easy.

Manager: Singers?

Man: Your singer. The guy who just sang a song and kissed us. Both.

Manager: I apologize, sir. But we don’t have any singers.

Woman: Then who was that guy?

Manager: (Looks offstage. Then replies) I believe he just finished eating his meal over at table 12.

Quick Blackout

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