You Couldn’t Call?

by Shannon McCormick

Lights up on woman alone onstage. She waits crossly. After a beat or two, the man enters.

MAN:

I am so sorry.

WOMAN (really, really angry, but bottled up anger):

Do you have any idea how long I’ve been waiting up for you? Do you?

MAN:

A long…time?

WOMAN:

YES A LONG TIME! Where have you been? You couldn’t call?

MAN:

Well, I didn’t think I would be out as long…I just lost track of time…baby, I’m so…

WOMAN:

SORRY? You’re so sorry? Is that what you were going to say? You better be sorry!

MAN:

I really am sorry, baby. Let me hug you and make it up to you. (goes to hug her)

WOMAN:

Oh, you reek! Don’t tell me you were out again? Tell me! You were out in the onion patch eating onions with those hobos again!

NARRATOR (entering):

Yes, it’s true. John had been out eating onions in the onion patch with his friends, the hobos. He had developed quite an addiction, a monkey on his back as they say, but in this case, a pungent, white, many-layered monkey that looked just like a giant onion.

Lights out
"You Couldn't Call?" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR

"You Couldn't Call?" debuted August 16, 2002.

Personnel:
Man-Shannon McCormick
Woman-Yasmin Kittles
Narrator-Jordan T. Maxwell

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