(Table & 2 chairs center stage. Fade up slowly on A & B who are talking already.)

A: Oong!

B: Ong?

A: Oong!

B: (Pause.) Ong?

A: Oong! (Shaping his mouth.) Ooooong!

B: (Pause.) Ong?

(Fade lights down. C sits on the table with a ukulele. Lights up. He plays a happy tune for a brief while, & when he is about to sing, the lights abruptly go down.)

C: Hey!

(Lights up on D sitting at the table. A enters. All their dialogue is dripping with sarcastic tones, & builds up to enraged shouting at the end.)

A: Sorry I m late.

D: Oh, that s fine. You know I d always wait for you.

A: That s so kind of you.

D: It s nothing, really. So, how was your day?

A: Perfect. There was not one thing wrong with my day. You?

D: About the same. I had a headache, but it went away.

A: You know the highlight of my day was?

D: No, I don t.

A: Spending this time with you.

D: Gee, you know just what to say, don t you?

A: I mean it.

D: Thank you very much.

A: That s quite alright.

D: You know, I really enjoy spending time with you. We really should do it more often.

A: I agree. Why don t we set a date?

D: I don t know. Why don t we?

A: Okay. How about this Saturday?

D: Six o clock?

A: Great.

D: Great. Well, I m sorry to cut this meeting short, but I really have to go.

A: So soon?

D: Pressing business engagement.

A: I understand. Saturday, then.

D: Saturday. Have a nice day.

A: You, too.

(D exits.)

A: What a pleasant chat.

(Lights down. Lights up on C sitting on the table, strumming the same tune, looking at the lights.)

C: (Singing.) Yesterday, I finally saw the light.

(Lights abruptly down.)

C: God Damn it.

(A & B are sitting at the table. A is laughing hysterically throughout B s monologue.)

B: What? What s so funny? No, what is it? What are you laughing at? Hey! I m talking to you! What are you Stop it! Tell me what you re What! What the f What the fuck are you laughing at? I asked you a question, asshole! Stop laughing, you cock! If If you don t stop laughing and tell me, I m gonna kick your fucking ass! What?!? What the fuck is so fucking funny?!? Just tell me! Godammit, fucking tell me, fucker!!

(A just continues to laugh. B finally exits. D enters.)

D: What? What? What s so funny? No, seriously, what?

(Lights down. C sits at the table. Lights up on him, arms crossed, looking up at the lights. After a moment, he picks up the ukulele, hesitates, and begins to play. Lights down.)

C: Screw this.

(He exits.)

"SIX ANGRY SKETCHES" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR

"Six Angry Sketches" debuted October 29, 1999.

Cast: A: Chris Stangl, B: Arlen Lawson, C: Jamal River, D: Aprille Clarke

Performed at Best of No Shame on December 10, 1999.

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