Card Trickby Jeff Goode & Nelson Oliver
There are SCRAPS OF NEWSPAPER on the floor.
NELSON drags in the PODIUM.
Nelson brings in his stool, sits down to watch.
OFFSTAGE VOICE: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
THE INCOMPARABLE CARD ILLUSIONS OF THE AMAAAAAAZING
Nelson stands, his arms upraised.
Nelson gestures toward JEFF, who enters, arms upraised.
Nelson leads the audience in applause.
Jeff goes to the podium, where he NOTICES SOMETHING WRONG.
JEFF: Arent we forgetting something?Nelson runs offstage
While my apprentice finishes setting up for tonights .
Nelson comes back with the TOWEL. He wipes the podium.
The deck of cards???
Nelson LEAVES THE TOWEL and runs off to get the DECK OF CARDS. Places it on the podium.
Because you cant very well do a CARD TRICK without a deck of cards. OR CAN YOU?Nelson starts the 7UP illusion.
You see, Magic is an ILLUSION,
A FIGMENT of your imagination.
It is not as some people used to believe.
The work of wizards. Or demons or ghosts. Or other supernatural beings.
Sorcery? No. Deviltry? No.
Magic is not miraculous.END of 7UP ILLUSION
It may be amazing. Fantastic. Awe-inspiring.
Nelson notices SCRAPS OF NEWSPAPER on the floor. He picks them up.
He WIPES THE FLOOR with the TOWEL. Puts it back.
Returns to his seat and reads the newspaper.
But awe and amazement are emotions. Human feelings. Created in your heart. They are not supernatural.
SIMPLE BEAUTY CAN INSPIRE THEM.
Canyons and fireworks. Kittens at play. Exceptional architecture.
Childbirth. Trivial things can STRIKE US WITH WONDER.
But we are not ENSPELLED OR BEWITCHED.
We are merely Human. And therefore susceptible to flights of fancy.
Illusion. Delusion. Hallucination . MAGIC.
Its all in your mind.
I have here an ordinary deck of cards!
LIGHTS DIM EXCEPT SPOT
Now, a magician cannot generally be trusted.
So Im having my apprentice select a volunteer from the audience.
Thank you HE MIGHT WANT TO OFFER YOU A SEAT
Whats your name?
Do you know my name?
And have you and I spoken before tonight?
Have you ever done a card trick?
Good. My apprentice is going to show you that there is nothing unusual about them.
HE MIGHT WANT TO TAKE THEM OUT OF THE BOX FIRST.
Now you could examine them if you like but we really dont have time for that now, so if you dont mind, my apprentice is going to riffle through the deck,
And if you could say STOP at any time.
This is your card.
Now, dont tell me, dont tell my apprentice, but if you could show the others.
Now put the card back in the deck, and while my apprentice SHUFFLES
What was your name again?
And what was mine?
Are you attending any shows at Piccolo Spoleto?
Just this one? Hows it going so far?
Now, I think thats more than enough shuffling.
Now my apprentice is going to riffle through the cards again, and when you say STOP--
Is this your card?
Let me try that again. As my apprentice riffles through. If you could just say STOP--
Is this your card?
All right, bring them over here.
(NELSON PUTS THEM BACK IN BOX and puts them on podium)
Now you know what caused that trick to back fire?NELSON KEEPS TRYING.
The Federal Minimum wage.
Because magic takes TALENT and years of experience,
And you just dont get that for $5.35 an hour.
And at those prices you can get a trained monkey or a dog.
Or maybe if youre lucky a graduate student.
But do you remember what I said before about magic being in your head?
The point is The magician is not important.
As long as YOU believe, thats what makes the magic happen,
And it doesnt matter if the illusion itself is performed by an experienced veteran or an INCOMPETENT NOVICE
(Nelson becomes suicidal)
It will SEEM magical to you,
Because the magic is really happening in here.
In that place that wants to believe in magic and puppies,
And summer walks on the beach.
And doesnt want to think about your parents divorce,
And your abusive step father,
And your botched suicide attempts.
And the fact that you dropped out of school to drink beer and smoke cigarettes,
And you didnt get a diploma and so now you wander from job to job. Messing up at everything you do, no matter how many breaks you get.
Because everyone who tries to help you gets this in repayment.
Messing up THEIR jobs so now they regret ever having taken you in in the first place!
Jeff finally notices that Nelson has slit his wrist.
Oh my God!
He runs to him. Nelson is dead.
Jeff gets the towel. Wipes off his arm.
Hes okay. Ignore him.
Because it is by ignoring the bad things.
And pretending they didnt happen.
Thats how magic happens.
What was your card?
She tells him. He repeats it for the rest of the audience.
And have I touched that deck since the beginning of this trick?
He reveals the card. The audience APPLAUDS.
Jeff TAKES a bow.
Jeff gestures to NELSON who LIES THERE DEAD and does not take a bow
FADE TO BLACK"Card Trick" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR
Performed by Nelson Oliver & Jeff Goode
Performed by Nelson Oliver & Todd Ristau.
Performed by Todd Ristau, Nelson Oliver, and an audience participant