Plaid. You know what?

Pastel. What?

Plaid. Girls aren't funny.

Pastel. What?

Plaid. Girls aren't funny.

Pastel. Are you sure?

Plaid. Well, try it.

Pastel. Right now?

Plaid. Go ahead.

Pastel. I can't.

Plaid. No pressure.

Pastel. I can't.

Plaid. Be funny.

Pastel. Well, maybe...

Plaid. No don't. Don't. Don't torture yourself.

Pastel. Why not?

Plaid. Because it hurts.

Pastel. No, why not aren't girls funny?

Plaid. Why not?

Pastel. Yes.

Plaid. Estrogen.

Pastel. What?

Plaid. Estrogen. It's not funny.

Pastel. Oh.

Plaid. It's not a funny hormone.

Pastel. Oh.

Plaid. Testosterone is different.

Pastel. You're right.

Plaid. Purely comic.

Pastel. Like a kind of pasta.

Plaid. But you wouldn't wanna eat it.

Pastel. So boys are funny.

Plaid. Without exception.

Pastel. That doesn't seem right.

Plaid. Well, look. Look at that one.

(Plaid points at a boy in the audience. They both laugh: HA HA HA HA.)

Pastel. Or this one.

(Pastel points at another boy in the audience. They both laugh: HA HA HA HA.)

Plaid. A girl can't do that. Look at her.

(Plaid points at a girl in the audience. They both give a sympathetic: AAH.)

Pastel. You're right.

Plaid. I know.

Pastel. Girls aren't funny.

Plaid. I know.

Pastel. So what do we do?

Plaid. You wanna know?

Pastel. Yes.

Plaid. I'll tell you.

Pastel. What?

Plaid. Be pretty.

Pastel. Be pretty?

Plaid. Be pretty.

Pastel. Right now?

Plaid. No pressure.

Pastel. I can't.