copyright © 2002 Jeff Goode

Photo Call (for No Shame 11/15/02)

(LIGHTS AT FULL FOR PHOTO CALL)

Jeff: This is a piece called Photo Call.

I need everyone who was in the show tonight up onstage... NOW

Rochlin this means you!

(Jeff assigns characters to everyone and places them around the stage.)

Jeff: When I say GO, I need you to STRIKE A POSE.

If you know how to FILL SPACE. Fill space.

Yes, you may VOCALIZE.

And GO.

Same character:

You are RUNNING FOR OFFICE as an INCUMBENT. Go!

Same character:

You are NOT, gay, lesbian or transexual. Go!

Same character:

You know YOU LEFT THAT LIPSTICK around here somewhere. Go!

Same character:

You CAN'T STOP the MUSIC. Go!

Same character:

There is NO TIME like the PRESENT. Go!

Same character:

You LOVE your NEIGHBOR. Go!

Same character:

You love your NEIGHBOR'S DOG. Go!

Same character:

You ALREADY LOVED your neighbor's dog and now for some reason there's a POLICE OFFICER knocking on your front door. Go!

Same character:

Those PANTS don't FIT! Go!

Same character:

What ITCHES? What ITCHES? What ITCHES? Go!

Same character:

PENIS ENVY. Go!

Same character:

VAGINAL DENTATA. Go!

Same character:

Maybe you should EXPLAIN what Vaginal Dentata is. Go!

Same character:

VICTORY is YOURS!! Go!

Same character:

GINGIVITIS is yours!! Go!

Same character:

There are NO HAMSTERS!! Go!

Same character:

You've HAD IT with this BULLSHIT! Go!

Same character:

You CAN'T GET ENOUGH of this bullshit! Go! [...opt. APPLAUSE]

NO LIGHT CHANGE.

GO STRAIGHT INTO POST SHOW.

 "Photo Call" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR
AUTHOR'S NOTES:
We tried to have a photo call for No Shame L.A. on the first night (10/25/02) in order to have publicity stills for future press kits. The results were disappointing, partly because things were a little chaotic and festive at the end of opening night, and some people had to leave early and etc. In addition, the first night was monologue-heavy - which is normal for a first No Shame but it meant that most of the photos were simply not very dynamic or theatrical.

We had a few requests for publicity photos, though, so we needed to organize another photo call as soon as possible, but there were logistical problems with that prospect as well.

I thought we might be able to get some half-way decent interim press photos if we just got a bunch of people onstage and had them do some freeze improvs. So I wrote out the above piece, and we slotted it as the last piece of the night, and we'll see how the photos turned out.

This is the light board op's version of the script (hence the light notes) and as anyone who was there knows, these are not exactly the things I said, but it was something like that.

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