James Lin Erwin
By the Beckett Parody

Lights down on James cue.
Lights up as James sits with his leg trapped under the table. Dan stands nearby. He glares balefully at James. James carefully avoids his gaze.

J: What news?
D: Should there be?
J: When hasn't there been?
D: Hasn't what been?
J: Hasn't it though? What news?
D: No news.
J: Good news.
D: (shouting) I said no news.
J: I can hear you.
D: I won't be heard.
J: I hear you.
D: I've nothing to say.
J: I hear you.

(pause)

J: What news?
D: The same. How's the leg?
J: Which leg?
D: The one you've trapped.
J: I haven't.
D: It is.
J: By my hand?
D: By your hip.
J: (shouting) My hand?
D: (shouting) Your LEG!
J: I've done nothing.
D: You don't deserve it?
J: What do I deserve?
D: You do deserve it.
J: You said I didn't.
D: I asked an opinion.
J: I didn't.

(pause)

J: How is the piece?
D: I don't like it.
J: You don t want your part?
D: I'm here.
J: You don't like it.
D: You didn't ask.
J: I did.
D: Not before.
J: That's better than now?
D: Is that?
J: Is what? You don't like it.
D: I don't like Beckett.
J: You don't like my parody.
D: I like your parody.
J: You said you didn't.
D: Ouvre.
J: I said PIECE! (slams fist)
D: I meant ouvre.
J: Let me out.
D: No.
J: My foot's asleep.
D: (suddenly animated) There's news!
J: That is new. DAMN! WAKE UP!
D: And now another action.
J: Only a phrase.
D: An action.
J: Never!
D: Why not?
J: Not enough time for blocking. WAKE UP!
D: I don't like the ouvre.
J: You don't like my metaphor.
D: Your metaphor is a parody.
J: The parody is the metaphor.
D: Oh! You mean farce.
J: I mean what I mean. Let me out.
D: I can't.
J: Why not?
D: You don't let me.
J: I could.
D: But you don't.
J: I could.
D: But you don't.

Lights down.

• September 3, 1999 - No Shame Iowa City
  

  Performed by James Erwin and Dan Brooks.

• April 17, 2002 - Special Wednesday "Taste of No Shame" in Currier Hall
  

  Performed by James Erwin and Mark Hansen.

• June 14, 2002 - No Shame Charlottesville
  

  Performed by Greg Hays and Todd Ristau

• January 30, 2003 - No Shame Miami
  

• October 3, 2003 - Special 17th Anniversary Retro-Shame (Iowa City)
  

  Performed by James Erwin and Dan Brooks

• November 1, 2004 - No Shame Mary Baldwin College
  

  Performed by Robert Gibbs and Alex Carney

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