Episode one

FARMER
Hop in, boy.

MIKE
Thanks, Mister. It’s been getting hot out on the road.

FARMER
Where you headed?

MIKE
America. I’m off to find America. Where are you headed?

FARMER
Oelwein.

MIKE
That’s good enough for me. Every journey must start with the first step.

FARMER
That’s a good ‘un. Yer pretty smart.

MIKE
Thank you. (Pause.) So, what about this farm crisis.

FARMER
Don’t start shit.

MIKE
Sorry. Just trying to make conversation.

FARMER
Well, tell me about this trip to find America.

MIKE
It’s bee a dream of mine to get in touch with the roots. With the real people out there. So, I’ve been working at the Maid-Rite in Waterloo to save up for this adventure. Last night, I decided I couldn’t wait any longer, I took my savings, three hundred and eleven dollars and thirty-seven cents, and a loaf of bread, and hit the road. (With youthful exuberance.) America, here I come. (Fade to the cop.)

JAVERT
My name is Javert. Annie Javert. Waterloo Police Department. The story you are witnessing is true. Be alert to all the facts. In the coming weeks, your cooperation will be appreciated as I track down a vicious murderer and thief. His name is Mike O’Malley and it is my sworn duty to apprehend him, no matter what the cost, no matter how far into the heart of America I must search. It all began on an overcast Wednesday morning in the Waterloo Maid-Rite.

JAVERT
So, you were the one who found the body?

ROGER
Yep. I was the one who found him. Upside down in a vat of Maid-
Rite.

JAVERT
And how do you think he died?

ROGER
Well, apparently, he suffocated in the Maid-Rite.

JAVERT
Was there any sign of a motive?

ROGER
Well, I tell you officer, there was some money missing. I checked the cast drawer and we’re missing three hundred and eleven dollars and thirty-seven cents.

JAVERT
Three hundred and eleven dollars and thirty-seven cents.

ROGER
And a loaf of bread.

JAVERT
(getting pissed.)
A loaf of bread. Now that’s pretty low.

ROGER
I know what you mean, officer. And poor ol’ Jake. Dead, now, and gone, and Maid-Rite was his life. I don’t know if we’ll be able to keep the business open without his firm guiding hand.

JAVERT
Pull yourself together son. Open up for business. He would have wanted it this way.

ROGER
I will, just as soon as the new guy gets here. He’s late, though and that’s unusual.

JAVERT
New guy?

ROGER
Yeah, a one-armed man we hired last week. He should be here by now. He’s never been late before......

JAVERT
(To audience.)
I know he’s out there somewhere. Mike O’Malley. Murderer. Thief. Desecrater of a Maid-Rite. And I’ll find him.

Fade to the truck

FARMER
You seen this shit in the paper about this harmonic convergence crap?

MIKE
Yeah, I read something about it.

FARMER
They say it’s an age of wild coincidences going to come upon us. Looky there, another hitch-hiker. Shame we ain’t got room to pick him up. And he’s only got one arm, too. Oh, well.

Fade to Javert

JAVERT
I know you’re out there, O’Malley. I’ll find you if it’s the last thing I do.....continued next week.

To Be Continue...

• September 18, 1987 - No Shame Iowa City
  

  FARMER          Sean Clark
  MIKE O'MALLEY   Mike Moran
  ANNIE JAVERT    Cheryl Snodgrass
  ROGER           Todd McNerney
  OLD JAKE        Brad Schnurr
  THIEF           Dan Gurler
  PAT RAMSEY      Bonnie Metzgar
  ROGER (2)       Dean Schmitt
  SANDI           Michele Sohner
  OTIS            Frank Ensenberger
  ROGER (3)       Jeri Schulke
  ONE-ARMED MAN   Brad Schnurr
  

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