copyright © 2001 Todd Ristau

Good Housekeeper Schweik

An absurdist attempt to distract the audience while getting the salt off the stage from the previous piece (q.v. Puberty Shriek, Episode 10).

Here, three audience members put on antlers and were supposed to move around through the audience and on the stage acting like deer--pawing and (in my imagination) maybe trying to nibble bark off people in the seats. We hear a vacuum cleaner start and a guy in a German WW1 uniform comes out and sweeps up the salt while the deer continue being deer. Then when the salt is swept up, the deer race off stage and the soldier says "Ze Deeer ist Terrrrible today!" and black out.

"Good Housekeeper Schweik" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR

AUTHOR'S NOTES:
Several things might have improved the piece. Like explaining it better to all involved. :) The deer didn't seem to really know what was going on, and two of them seemed frightened of the deer that had gotten up and started making a sound like a wounded fox during the preceeding scene. Then that fox deer started doing a Nazi salute to the soldier doing the cleaning, which I guess was probably mild compared to what Fox Deer had wanted to do when I told him that he had to just act like a deer and not do any comedy improv during the scene. I also should have realized that two cans of Morton's Salt is about the size of a full vacuum cleaner bag and maybe should have put a new bag in before the piece...oh, well, most of the salt got swept up, but it took a lot longer than anyone could have wanted. And the soldier said the wrong line, though what he said was certainly true--"Ze Deeeer is acting very strange today!"

Anyway--it was weird and kind of funny to watch. More funny than just coming out with a broom and dust pan after the first piece, and I got someone else to clean up my mess, which was the whole point, I guess...that and get my genuine WW1 German helmet on stage.

"Good Housekeeper Schweik" debuted November 30, 2001.

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