(Lights Up on table and chair)

(Jessica enters. She is dressed in pajamas and carrying a can of shaving cream, a razor, a glass of water, and a towel. She sits on the table and hikes her leg up on the chair. She pulls up her pant leg and applies shaving cream to her leg. She begins to shave. She shaves one leg and then turns to the audience.)

May 6, 1992. That was the first time I ever shaved my legs. So I've been doing this for 8 years. I figured that I shave approximately every 4 days, so that means I've shaved 730 times since I was 12. Well, then you have to subtract 2 months from that because - my senior year in high school, our football team actually won its first game. As a joke, my friends and I decided we wouldn't shave our legs until they lost. They usually sucked, so we didn't think this was too risky. They went to the playoffs.undefeated. - so that's 730 minus 2 months worththat makes 714 times, give or take a couple. 714 times figure about 10 minutes each time and that's 119 hours - almost 5 days - spent doing THIS. All for an American tradition. God, that SUCKS!

(Lights Down)
"An American Tradition" or "Use cream and it wont hurt so much!" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR

"An American Tradition" or "Use cream and it wont hurt so much!" debuted June 2, 2000 performed by Jessica Ahrendt.

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