Okay, new season off to an unenthusiastic start, except for the order being read like Keenan and Kel. That was cool.
1. Shane O'Shaughnessy - Welcome Back, Y'all!
[Shane lists off the top ten people of 2002 that should be smacked. O'Shaughnessy, comic monologue]
2. Will Kapp - Sammy, Johnny and Johnny's Brother
[Is it possible to swing so hard that you go over the bar? You might die trying, and if you succeed, you might end up eating the bodies of those that failed. And you'd be right to. Kapp, seriocomic monologue]
3. Nick Brady, Joe Mozena - Nerds for News Nightly
[Nerd navigates through dream of monsters and minimallly dressed women. Mozena, Brady, Waterhouse, Plattner, Brown, Sullivan, others. Comedic sketch]
4. "Tom Willoughby" - Because I said so
[our favorite sponser poses as Tom and says fuck a few times. They can't take down the lights if the lights were never up to begin with. Lestina, Willoughby. Comedic sketch]
5.Brittany Verhoef - We do have medical insurance
[Shane and Brittany sing about having sex with Kyle Phillips' sister, become very nervous about Kyle's sense of humor. Verhoef, O'Shaughnessy. Comedic sketch with music]
6. Devin Waterhouse, Tom Willoughby - Missing You
[a love song from freshman year. Willoughby, Waterhouse. musical performance]
7.Soheil Rezayazdi - Something About Airports
[Muhammad bought his camel skin briefcase at a Dillard's made of sand. Soheil can say really funny things because he's a minority. Rezayazdi, comedic monologue]
8.Sadie Smith - The day Baby Jesus Cried Massive Tears of Pain and Sadness: a tragicomic melodrama by Sadie Smith
[Lesbian flirtation, spoons. Smith, Wuehle. "tragicomic melodrama"]
9. Anne Sullivan - Go Fish
[Dominos, truth or dare, kissing boyfriends. It fills Anne with crippling insecurity that Yes Shame is reviewed on the internet, but they seem to like Emily. Wuehle, Sullivan. comedic sketch]
10. Caleb Brown - The Customer is sometimes Right
[a customer must have menu read a loud a million times, and things get ugly. Brown, Plattner. comedic sketch]
10.5 Sir Phobos - Little Star of Doom-things
[Twinky eating cut short by sponsers concern for Shane's airway]
1. Osh, the Groovy Antelope - Two-Fisted Space Drive
[Shane reads a rap. It has stuff in it. Prompts lights out #1. O'Shaughnessy, rap performance.]
2. Dan O'Shaughnessy - Top 10
[The Top 11 Reasons you will never mistake Dan for Shane. O'Shaughnessy, comedic monologue]
3. Will Kapp - Stairway to Lights Off
[Will attempts to learn how to play Stairway to Heaven... onstage! Yes Shame likes the Hawkeyes. Kapp, musical performance/reality theatre.]
3.5 Anne Sullivan - Recipe for a Broken Heart
["And a dash of... dreams?" Smith, Wuehle, Yoshida; comedic poetry performance]
4. Ian Bennett - Churchyard Wrestling
[Priests tell choirboys how to wrestle. It's gross, prompts Lights Off #2. Bennett, Kapp, Rezayazdi, Protextor; comedic sketch]
*Here there was a brief but well-deserved reprimanding from Doug on content and language. "Take it to No Shame!" he says.
5. Bill McKenna - THIS IS HOW YOU YES SHAME THEATRE
[Various Yes Shame regulars talk about what is important to them, dance, and chase Nick Brady. McKenna, Callahan, Sullivan, Yoshida, Lestina, Brady; comedic sketch]
6. Caleb Brown - Life as Caleb
[A slice of life from the man with two graphing calculators. Brown, solo comedic performance]
6.5 Elizabeth Breed - Men Who Rock my World
[Musings and gripes about the male sex. There is life outside of boy bands. Breed, comedic monologue]
7. Aaron Brummer - Warm and Fuzzy
[Aaron expresses his disgust with his softer side, simultaneously voicing the current attitude of Yes, Shame theatre. Brummer, comedic monologue]
8. Soheil Rezayazdi - My Girlfriend Dumped me for Pierre Pierce
[Boyfriend finds Girlfriend grinding with the "courageous" basketball player. Rezayazdi, Liddell-Westefeld; comedic monologue]
9. Ian Bennett & Adam Protextor - Ticket to Hell
[Family eats Bible for dinner. Revelations reportedly "too spicy". Bennett, Brown, Smith, Protextor; comedy sketch]
9pi. Joe Mozena & Nick Brady - I'm a Southern Baptist and I'm Proud of it
[Father tries to force atheist son to go to church. Mozena, Brady; comedic sketch]
10. Sadie Smith - The Time Bill McKenna Punched me in the Arm and felt real bad
[Future Bill should have warned Past Bill not to hit Sadie with a spoon. Smith, McKenna; comedy sketch]
11. Chris Liddell-Westefeld - Arie, Let's Get Some Sluts
[When Doug Lestina was a teenager, he was unsure and scared. Luckily, he was Czechoslovakian. McKenna, Liddell-Westefeld, Schultz, Hovenkamp, Johnson, Callahan, Sullivan; comedy sketch]
12. Bill McKenna - Will, You Marry Me!
[Sexy William and Tall William demonstrate the art of the double-take on Baby William. McKenna, Wuehle, Callahan; comedic sketch]
13. Erica Finken - The Cost of Coincidence
[We shouldn't attack Iraq. Finken, public service announcement.]
13.5. Cullen Vens - The Trials of Fillip K. Dormieaux
[Couple has dispute over boyfriend's assault on Fillip. Vens, Sullivan; comedy sketch]
14. Kyle Phillips - In Memory of my Dog
[Poor Kyle's dog. Phillips, comedic monologue]
14.5. White Cat - Grandpa Makes Funny Noises
[William sees past, present, and future with grandpa. Callahan, McKenna; comedy sketch]
15. Emily Yoshida - A Morality Tale
[Emily beats the system and manages to stick up her middle finger without Doug's knowing... until Yes Shame shuts down. Yoshida, Lestina; comedy monologue]
1. Kyle Phillips - Why They Hate Us
2. Bill McKenna - Viral Meningitis
[The three lads exchange insults in the vein of "your cruisin' for a bruisin'. Audience helps out. McKenna, Callahan, Stuart Stutzman; comedy sketch]
3. Will Kapp - Burt Lancaster
[Burt's having a bad day, and it's not helped by Gigantic Jugs. Kapp, Brown, Sullivan; comedy sketch]
4. William Callahan - William Callahan in: Swingtime!
[Music and tears. Callahan, McKenna; performance.]
5. Whitney Ringen - The Misadventures of a Young Master Copehagen
[Tiny man hides on ceiling, watches people. Ringen; comedic monologue]
6. Joe Mozena - Shootin' up, Lookin' in the Mirror
[Joe, Kevin, and Caleb shoot up. Drugs? True. Mozena, Plattner, Brown, Brady; comedy sketch]
6.5. Sadie Smith - Pirate Joke
[What was the Pirate movie rated? PG-13. Smith, ??Witzke??; comedy sketch]
7. Sohiel Rezayazdi - Adam starts a slow clap at Soheil's Funeral (aka Soheil Dies, No One Cries)
[Soheil tries to read another long-winded monologue, is shot down by his peers, dies, and nobody cares. Rezayazdi, Bennett, Protextor, Liddell-Westefeld, Lestina; comedy sketch]
8. Caleb Brown - I Wish I Was an Irish Setter
[A poem with background noise. Brown, Mozena, Kapp, Yoshida, Plattner; poetry]
9. Sadie Smith - Hey hey, it's Opposite Day
[Poor William hates Opposite Day. I mean he LOVES IT! Smith, Callahan, McKenna; comedy sketch]
10. Joe Mozena & Nick Brady - Cos I
[Joe and Nick do math, everyone is confused. Mozena, Brady; math performance]
11. Ian Bennett - Creationism vs. Evolution: Let God Decide!
[Boy tries to do his confessional, but gets in a C vs. E debate with God, who has power over lightning. Bennett, Kapp; comedy sketch]
12. Anne Sullivan - Five Minute Time Limit
[Girl tries to get boyfriend to answer the question, but time is running out! Sullivan, Kapp; comedy sketch]
13. Emily Yoshida - HAVE AT
[Terror at Channel Eleven! Yoshida, dramatic monologue-story]
1. Arie Hovenkamp - Superhero!
(preview for upcoming movie starring Matt Mobily. tv screen, video)
1.5. Kyle Phillips - Kyle's thing
(Kyle's Shane! Phillips)
2. Soheil Rezayazdi - Drama of the mellow variety
(boy orders 9 1/2 dozen roses a little prematurely, tries to cancell order. Liddell-Westefeld, Rezayazdi. dramatic sketch)
3. Anne Sullivan - Grass
(sitting on bench, digging out wedges of bench with fingernails. Sullivan, dramatic monologue)
4. Mark Johnson - Cookies
(Mark is frustrated that his problems are so easily solved. This problem is easily solved. Johnson, dramatic monologue with music)
5. Erica Finken - Watch while I impersonate Alex
(Erica and Alex really should admit to their love, Alex really should come to Anne's party, Anne really is a bimbo. Finken, Yoshida, Sullivan. Comedic sketch)
6. Joe Mozena and Nick Brady - I don't know!
(Why can Nick only seem to say a few words? It drives Joe so crazy! Mozena,Brady. Comedic sketch)
7. Ian Bennett - Rubik's cube: a metaphor for pain
(Bennett attempts to solve rubic's cube, deals with crippling physical pain, if only he had more time...Bennett, dramatic monologue)
7.5 Caleb Brown - You're a silly goose
(Brown tricks Nick into saying that he is a goose. Brown, Brady)
8.Shamus "Kilty McBagpipes" O'Shaughnessy - A Dire Public Service Announcement/a story
(yes....Shane? yes. Shane requests new name, takes suggestions. O'Shaughnessy, comedic monologue)
9. Chris Liddell-Westefeld - The Laugh Show
(dying daughters are rarely funny enough to keep ratings up, not even with Goran Vijnic[guy from ER's screwy foreign name?!] Protexter, Rezayazdi, Johnson, Liddell-Westefeld. Seriocomic sketch)
10. Kevin Plattner - Beautiful Clarinet Music
(Plattner definately comes unglued, throws about surely hundreds of dollars worth of clarinet reeds. Plattner)
11. Andrea Cramer - Valentine's Day Gift Ideas
(exactly that-have you thought about giving your love your heart...LITERALLY? hahahaha! Cramer, comedic monologue)
12. Adam Protexter - IRAQ! the musical
(IRAQ! the musical, it was. Liddell-Westefeld, Johnson, Willoughby, Protexter, Bennett, others. Musical performance)
.5 Walker Dunnington - Lazer Tizag
(boys shoot eachother with tiny little guns that make funny noises. Dunnington, Willoughby)
1. Sadie Smith - The hugest Snowpile in Snowpile County
(a girl learns a hard lesson about class discrimination and murdering dolphins. seriocomic scene, Johnson, Smith)
2.Ian Bennett - Mr. L Returns to Junior High
(the story of our sponser becoming a teacher to torture children. comedic scene, Bennett, Protexter, O'Shaughnessy, Brown, Brodersen, others)
3. Caleb Brown - Sexy Sadie
(Sadie and Caleb discuss the Beatles, politics. Explain to Bill, learn to love. comedic scene, Brown, Smith, Mckenna)
4.Chris LiddellhyphenWestefeld - Senseless Graphic Violence in the Name of Security
(two men shop for duct tape to prepare for terror attacks, have a knife fight to the death for the last role. Seriocomic scene, Johnson, Esack Grueskin, Liddell-Westefeld, Brown)
4.5 Mckenna, Sullivan, Brodersen - A Hello To Arms
(raise your right hand...no your OTHER! no your OTHER!! Attack Iraq? no. Mckenna, Brodersen)
5.Devin Waterhouse - Insomnia
(musical performance. Waterhouse, Willoughby)
5.5 Aaron Brummer - Ode to Sadie Smith
(Sadie, pretty lady. Aaron is sorry he cut off your set at the band show. poetry performance, Brummer)
6. Andrea Cramer and Anne Dvorsky - Corn
(girls wonder what happens to the bodies of people who drown in corn silos. seriocomic scene, Cramer, Dvorsky)
7. Joe Mozena - I love you
(boy can make everything better with three little words. seriocomic scene, Yoshida, Mozena)
8. Bill McKenna - Naked William Callahan by William Callahan
(rods cones photons. Accidentally learning sucks. seriocomic monologue, Mckenna, Smith, Sullivan)
8.5 Erin Brodersen and Eliza Ahrens - Hamburg Inn-A-OK
(one two three DRAW! dry erase marker fight. Ahrens, Brodersen)
9. Erin Brodersen - Washington Island Wisconsin
(girl knows it is difficult to drown when the water is frozen over, even when drunk. Dramatic monologue, Brodersen)
10. Erica Finken - Scene in Newslab
(the newslab is such a mess! The printer's always jammed! comedic scene, Ahrens, Finken)
11. Nick Brady - Half Now
(no one told Nick there was no yes shame last week. He was lonely. Comedic scene, Lestina, Mozena, Brady, Plattner, Yoshida, Sullivan, O'Shaughnessy, others)
11.5 Bill MckickaKicka - Heavy Metal Brummer
(he fell in love with a Brummer. Fell in love with a Brummer. Musical performance, Mckenna)
12. Shane O'Shaughnessy - Chocked Full of Chicken Nuggets
(Shane thinks about stuff in General Psych class. Seriocomic monologue, O'Shaughnessy)
12.5 Cullen S. Vens - If I were an American
(if he were an american, poor asian women would want to have his giant american babies. if you were from another country, he would eat your fingers. Comedic monologue, Cullen S. Vens)
13. Adam Protexter - IRAQ! the musical II
(the bloody conclusion to IRAQ! the musical. Johnson, Phillips, Protexter, others)
14. Anne Sullivan - Car Door
(Avocadoes are fruit because they have pits. weak arms can do things right. Seriocomic monologue, Sullivan)
15. Emily Yoshida - My Turn to Cop Out
(little girls with cancer fold origami cranes. so does Emily. Emily answers questions about life. QandA session, Yoshida)
16. Whitney Ringen - Too Late
(there is nothing like the first time...YOU LOOSE YOUR STUDENT PLANNER! comedic monologue, Ringen)
1. Matt and Mark - Snow Day
[Song about how great it is to not have school when it snows. Featuring bloody Arie. Oh my God, he is So Hot. Mobily, Johnson, Liddell-Westefeld, Hovenkamp; Musical performance]
2. Candie Wuehle - Chronic Symbiosis
[Woman wonders about her real name, and if any of the other apples are any good. Wuehle, McKenna; dramatic monologue]
3. Cullen S. Vens - If I were a Rastafarian
[Rasta man and Cuban have dispute over bobsledding, murder. Vens, Mobily; comedic sketch]
3.5. Nick Brady - Doing Something
[An amazing device is revealed onstage. Brady; blackout sketch]
4. Devin Waterhouse - Acoustical Journey
[The rough draft of an epic acoustic ballad is presented for the audience's approval. Waterhouse, musical performance.]
5. Majoezenajosephinamozena - I Love Sugar
[Tonight on News for Nerds Nightly, everyone learns that nerds and sugar is a terrible combination. Plattner, Mozena, Brady, Brown, Waterhouse; comedic sketch]
6. Soheil Rezayazdi, Rebecca McCray, Emily Yoshida - (This is) The Dream of Soheil and Rebecca
[In a mythical land, Soheil and Rebecca dream of a new future. Elliot Smith makes us want to die. McCray, Rezayazdi, Yoshida; comedic sketch]
7. Tom Willoughby - Amazing Boy Saves the Day
[While creating nuclear warheads, feelings are hurt and worlds destroyed. Willoughby, Protextor; Comedic sketch]
7.5 Cullen S. Vens - Bacon
[Traditional or Canadian, which is better? Maple lover testifies. Vens, Hovenkamp; comedic sketch]
8. Shane O'Shaughnessy - 23 Skidoo!
[Shane fails at his love poems and then pops the big question to one lucky lady. O'Shaughnessy, Anne Dvorsky; life-changing moment]
9. Nick Brady - Goth Club Part 1
[What happened to Math Club? Evil abounds, kids get hurt. Brady, Plattner, Brown, Mozena, Sullivan, Yoshida; comedic sketch]
10. Soheil Rezayazdi - Monologue... more like 'Yawn-a-Logue'
[Birthday Boy accused of stealing father's thunder, smuggles beer into Denny's. Rezayazdi, comedic monologue]
11. Erica Finken - Erica, Anne and Alex: The Saga Continues
[Erica and Alex would make a really good couple... Alex find this out during an unlikely coat mismatch. Ahrens, Sullivan, Finken, Yoshida; comedic sketch]
11.5. Erin Broderson - Buy this Shirt
[NKotB shirt auctioned off to Caleb Brown. Broderson; auction?]
12. Adam Protextor and Max Radl - (L)egalize (S)uperior (D)rugs
[Boy finds "piece of paper" on ground, licks it, horror and boxers ensue. Protextor, McCray, Willoughby, Radl, Johnson, O'Shaughnessy, Vens, others; comedic sketch]
12.5. Bill McKenna - There's a Party gonna happen, Are you Invited?
[Party takes place behind the curtain, half the audience uninvited. McKenna, others; comedic performance]
13. Anne Sullivan - The Very Last Sketch Concerning Love
[Why not make a new genre? Science fiction from here on out! Aliens report on state of universe. Sullivan, Smith, Brady; seriocomic sketch]
13.5 Sadie - Atomic Theory is Lonely
[When Boy put his hand on Girl's shoulder, all Girl could feel was the repulsion of his electrons, and the repulsion he had for her, and the repulsion she had for him. no touching. no laughs. just sad.]
14. the Brothers McBored - A Dish Best Served Cold
[A Song about how artsy our shit is. Willoughby, Waterhouse; musical performance.]
15. Emily Yoshida - COLLEGE GIRL!
[Girl shipped to Common University finds solace in furs and corsets. Yoshida; comedic monologue]
1. Chris Liddell-Westefeld - A Rare Moment of Clarity
[Boy calls girl and confesses his desire to eat her face off. Liddell-Westefeld, Sullivan; seriocomic sketch]
2. Kevin Plattner - Be My Friend
[Anne and Kevin beat around the bush, but we know what she really wants. Plattner, Sullivan; comedy sketch]
2.5. Erin Broderson - When You Break my Stuff, I Kill You
[Boy breaks girl's sled, apologizes. Broderson, McKenna; comedy sketch]
3. Shane O'Shaughessy - If I was a fish i would SCREAM!
[Two pieces in one! One by Shane's woman, one by the man himself. One about an open casket funeral, the other about decapitation. They have fun dates. O'Shaughessy, dual comic monologue]
4. NRK - Clumbsy (Re-Mix)
[A cappella rap performance. Neil Kellogg; a cappella rap performance]
5. Mark Johnson - Theme Songs to Life
[The plight of the ordinary themesong-less man put to dance. Johnson, comic monologue]
6. Caleb Brown - What?
[What? People I can't remember, I blacked out; comic sketch]
2pi. Joe Mozena - Halo Smack Talk
[Nick continues to one-up Joe as Joe antagonizes him. So much hate! Mozena, Brady; comic sketch]
7. Bill McKenna - Police Adventures
[Rookie and Vet policemen paired together on a mission! And the rookie wants to driiive!??? Sullivan, Callahan, Brady, Smith; comic sketch]
8. Devin Waterhouse and Tom Willoughby - Only to Discover
[Song and Guitar, for Shea's birthday. Willoughby, Waterhouse; musical performance]
9. Caleb Brown and Kevin Plattner - Bush, Bringer of War
[Boys march around to "Mars, Bringer of War". It's suspenseful. Brown, Plattner, Bennett, others; dance performance]
10. sadie smith - i have got to get these sea urchins back to the harbor and OUT OF MY LIFE, for good this time
[Child wants attention, mommy too busy with baby, we all have to grow up at some point. Michael Tabor, Yoshida, Smith; seriocomic sketch]
11. Michael Tabor - Sleepy-Time Burgers
[Classic tale of burgers and hobos, this time told to live children! Tabor, Thompson, Callahan, McKenna; comic monologue]
11.5. Kyle Phillips - Drugs, the Anti-Drug
[Stoner kids make plans to impregnate/run over little girls. Protextor, Willoughby, Phillips; comic sketch]
12. Daniel Kolen - What it's like to be a Jewish me
[Autobiographical narrative of boy and his antisemitic classmates. A menorah falls. Kolen, comic monologue]
13. Anne Sullivan - These Boots
[How did she get those boots! She'll tell you, and it's a harrowing tale. Sullivan, comic monologue]
13.5. Adam and Caleb - Lady
[Boys find sympathy in Styx ballad. Protextor, Brown; lip-synch performance]
14. Soheil - Soheil and Rebecca Down by the Schoolyard
[Soheil and Rebecca try to learn how to dance, but you can't dance without love, and new-age music on AM Radio. Rezayazdi, McCray, Yoshida; comic sketch]
15. William Callahan and Jason Nebergall - The Intelligence of Remembering
[Boys try to do Yes Shame piece, it kind of works. Callahan, Nebergall, Thompson; comic sketch]
16. Emily Yoshida - The Last Monologue About Anything
[The truth, as told by inspirational quotes in our planners and the stories that go with them. Yoshida, informational monologue]
There was totally some Yes Shame last night Last night? You mean 3/25/03 Oh yeah, I remember, it was in the Little Theatre
Aaaaand.... it was Mark Johnson's Birthday!
1. Andrew Ketterer & Shane O'Shaughnessy - Best of DBJ's
[Some jokes about babies, babies dying. Ketterer, O'Shaughnessy; joke skit]
1.5. Kyle Petrie and Caleb Brown - Your Mom
[When Caleb gets mad at Kyle, he gets a taste of his own medicine. Petrie, Brown; comedy sketch]
2. Cullen S. Vens - Of Mice and...
[Boy and his handicapped friend escape from a rodent-ridden planet, discuss rodent politics, movies. Vens, Hovenkamp; comedy sketch]
3. White Cat - Laugh Haaaaaard... It's a Long way to the bank
[Narrator and friend Old E get rich quick off of a pile of dino rocks. Callahan, comic monologue]
4. Soheil Rezayazdi - Laugh at the Unlaughable
[DJ plays "I will survive" at a wedding, is appalled by the stupidity of those around him. Rezayazdi; seriocomic monologue]
5. Shane O'Shaughnessy - Songs of Monsanto
[Shane tries to do a speech on Legalization, accidentally becomes Southern along the way. O'Shaughnessy, comic monologue]
6. Caleb Brown - Perhaps the 'Soldiers' are Not in the Right Place
[Two U.S. soldiers try to stay focused on the task at hand, too bad they're in Morocco, not Iraq. Mozena, Brown, Rezayazdi; comedy sketch]
7. Anne Sullivan - Smoke, or The Ghost of Jack Daniels
[Why do ghosts only haunt houses? Are burn victims human? These questions answered and more. Yoshida, Smith; comic dia-logue]
8. Will Kapp - Raise-a-Child, Inc.
[The president of Raise-a-Child, Inc. realizes his faults as an entrepeneur, begs for forgiveness from tied-up parents. Kapp, Radl, Hovenkamp, Johnson, Smith; comedy sketch]
9. Adam Protextor - KOD
[The rapping debut of P-tech and human beat machine Max Radl. Protextor, Radl; rap performance]
9.5. Cullen S. Vens - Dead Man Reading
[Cullen has a funny voice when he reads a passage from a movie script. Vens, vocal experiment]
10. Joe Mozena - Jaded
[Joe listens to "Jaded" on repeat on his discman, as he does before and after Yes, Shame every night. Mozena, monologue]
10.5. Adam/Arie - Stupid Invalid
[Adam gets tired of pushing Arie around. It's Mark's birthday. Protextor, Hovenkamp; comedy sketch]
11. sadie smith - brachydactyl dayz
[Husband accidentally sends underdeveloped embryos to a dinosaur camp. Smith, McKenna; comedy sketch]
11.5. Shane O'Shaughnessy & Adam Protextor - Truth
12. Michael Tabor & Bill McKenna - Musical Haircut
[Real haircut given onstage, with music. McKenna, Tabor, Callahan, Denise Dooley, Yoshida, Thompson; hair performance]
13. Anne Sullivan & Emily Yoshida - Happy Birthday, Mark
[Song for a birthday boy, en francais. Yoshida, Sullivan; music-thing]
14. Emily Yoshida - Cat
[Affection-starved kills cats to keep her perspective. Yoshida, Callahan; dramatic scene]
1. White Cat & Boney Macaroni - Hau Two Ruze Cauldrons
[Force babies to start makin' money instead of takin' money, through synergy and tiny business suits. Callahan, McKenna; family secret performance]
1.5 Dan O'Shaughnessy - Visa Card
[More confusion related to the striking similarities between the words 'shane' and 'shame'. Lil' O'Shaughnessy, Ol' O'Shaughnessy; parody parody skit]
2. Soheil Rezayazdi, Will Kapp, & Chris L~W - S.S. Kiss Me
[Director gives speech on believability, rendition of 'Kiss Me' is played with the inevitable payoff. Rezayazdi, Kapp, Liddell-Westefeld; dramatic music performance]
3. Emily Yoshida & Rebecca McCray - This is a Roast!
[Wheelchair-Soheil likes Nicole Kidman's nose and ass, them girls won't let him forget it! McCray, Yoshida; roast comedy skit]
3.5 Erin Brodersen - The WRONG Way to Eat a Reeces
[Several incorrect ways of eating a Reeces are shown, disproving the adage. Sullivan, Brodersen; Reeces Piece]
4. Michael Tabor - I love almost everybody... except Joseph Campbell!
[Michael Tabor plays the rootinest tootinest Apriliest foolin' joke upon robotic Bill McKenna! Sullivan, Yoshida; comedy skit.]
5. Cullen St. Vens (Posthumous) - This Dude That Dude
[?-I went into the hallway and missed part of this piece, and the fact Adam and Tom were in the exact same stage positions for #6, made the two overlap in my mind--anyone help? Protextor, Willoughby; comedy skit]
5.5 Anonymous - There is a joke hidden underneath the rootbeer bottle in the podium offstage--someone read it!
[What's the best way to watch a plane heading towards the World Trade Center? Through a collide-o-scope. Tabor, Callahan; treasure-hunt joke performance]
6. Adam Protextor - The Ballad of Tom and Adam
[Tom ate Adam's award-winning dog--boy, Adam is none-too-pleased! Protextor, Willoughby; comedy performance]
7. Tanya & Jessi - Stinky
[Please stop asking whether the skunk still has its stinkin' glands. Hogan, Jessi; animal performance]
8. Adam Protextor & Shane O'Shaughnessy - Smarmy Rebels
[Shane raps, then Adam freestyles, riddled with poor beatboxing. Protextor, O'Shaughnessy; rap battle]
9. Devin Waterhouse - Round Two
[Devin plays a revised & polished version of a previously performed song. Waterhouse; musical performance]
10. Emily Yoshida - One Peach
[Pleasantries of peaches, in verse! Sullivan, Yoshida; performance]
11. White Cat - The days that we wulz seen!
[The history of the world, candles & dinosaurs & on. Callahan; monologue]
12. Joe Mozena - Road Trip
[Man keeps insisting the road trip's destination is a city in England, with much dismay from the woman. Mozena, Sullivan; comedy scene]
13. Tom Willoughby - How to Fish with Dynamite, 'cause it's hellaz sweet!
[A detailed discourse on a personal dynamite fishing experience, proclaiming it to be hellaz sweet. Willoughby; comedy monologue]
14. Sadie Smith - Daddy Long Legs
[A telephone conversation deals with window screens and squirrels in the classroom. Liddell-Westefeld, Smith; dialogue]
15. Shane O'Shaughnessy - The Nature of Perspicacity or What Happened to Jesus Kong
[Is King Jesus Kong our savior? This comedy monologue starring Shane O'Shaughnessy would seem to suggest so.]
1. Erin Brodersen and Anne Sullivan - Birthday
[Growing older is hard. Johnson, Ahrens, movie]
2. Bryan Lynch - a Tragic End to a Beautiful Friendship
[It is confusing when your hamster is named Beaver, and a snake hole isn't a good place for it. Lynch, Phillips, O'Shaughnessy, tragicomic sketch]
3. Soheil Rezayazdi - Back Seat Betty
[boy is fed up with girlfriend, but she puts out. Rezayazdi, Mccray, comic scene]
4. Anne Sullivan - The Spring Time Takes No Snowman Prisoners
[The children perish first. Sullivan, poetry performance]
5.White Cat - Your Time to Shine!
[ancient chinese dynasty--turned upsidedown! Mckenna, Callahan, noise performance]
6. Will Karp - Jail Break!
[man thrown in jail for running so fast, escapes! comedic monologue, Kapp]
7.Kindergarten Sadie - A story I wrote in Kindergarten
[Girl tries to find friend to share strawberry ice cream, chocolate ice cream declared "gross." Smith, kindergarten writing]
8. Shane O'Shaunessy - HATRED, INTOLLERANCE, and the American Way
[Shane is disapointed in us, wears dress. scolding performance]
9. Tom Willoughby - Hits Doug in the back with a chair THRICE
[exactly that. chair violence performance, Lestina, Willoughby]
.5. Caleb Brown - Advice
[Don't pull the fire alarms, your hands get purple...? Brown, comedy thing]
1. Mark Johnson - Thunderstorm
[Song about how you can tell it's going to rain, and soon. Johnson, musical performance]
1.5. Michael Tabor - Hit it in Your Car
[Wakes never work. Tabor, McKenna; comedy sketchito]
2. Chris Liddell-Westefeld - Perfecting the Matrix
[Keanu gets into character for bullet-dodging scene. Kapp, Rezayazdi, Johnson, Sullivan, Liddell-Westefeld; comedy scene]
3. Erin Broderson - I Hope this is Too Scary for You and you Run Out Screaming
[Monsters, Robots, Zombies. Scary! Broderson, musical performance.]
4. Paul Rust - Fart
[Man has Eddie Murphy for a fart sound. McKenna, Tabor; comedy scene]
5. Ian Bennett - Superheroing is What I Do
[Fight with Invisible Man goes terribly awry. Bennett, Kapp, Smith; comedy scene]
5.5. Candie Wuehle - The Pirate Van Gogh
[Vincent's ear accident and what he wants you to think. Wuehle, Sullivan; comedy piece]
6. Aaron Brummer - WOE EZ US
[Aaron sad about his lackluster beatboxing, is comforted by self-righteous Emily. Brummer, Yoshida; comedy scene]
6.5. Boney Macaroni & Mandarin Tangerine 1st and 2nd Kings
[A one joke piece, whose one joke escapes me. Oh yes, Siam. McKenna, Tabor; comedy thing]
7. Michael Tabor & Bill McKenna - Ancient Chinese Dynasty
[Encore of last weeks super-piece, this time with giant Tabor as baby Callahan. Tabor, McKenna; comedy thing]
8. Boney Macaroni & Mandarin Tangerine - How many pieces can we put in the order?
[Various things that are indicated by big hands. Tabor, McKenna; comedy thing]
9. T-Dawg - What Ho
[Shakespeare guys go skirt-chasing. Willoughby, Dan Hanson, Marra Burr; comedy scene]
10. Chris Stangl when he was in high school in like 1996 - Found Monologue Series #5: 'Homeroom Announcements!'
[Surly teacher reads announcements, cracks down on students. Stangl, comedic monologue]
11. Emily Yoshida - Mary Shelley
[Mary Shelley eats a pineapple, makes metaphors. Yoshida, Sullivan; comedy piece]
12. Anne Sullivan - Spice Trade
[Awkward reunion dinner gets awkwarder, bloodier. Smith, Yoshida, Liddell-Westefeld; dramatic scene]
1. Mark Johnson - 'When I die, I'll be ready'
[Mark displays how well his voice works with an acoustic guitar. Guitar Performance: Johnson]
2. Candy Wuehle - Proof of Life
[Candy speaks of re-birth in poem form. Poem: Wuehle]
3. Caleb Brown - [no title]
[Skit about hoe-downs with a pun at the end. Comedy Skit: Brown, Sullivan, Broderson, Lestina, Kapp, Johnson, Callahan(?)]
4. Soheil Rezayazdi - These Colors DO NOT Run!
[Talk of bumper stickers and what they have to with each other. Serio-comic Monologue: Rezayazdi]
5. Chris Liddell-Westefeld - Love Eternal: A Cautionary Tale
[Beautiful little story of a relationship between a freshmen and a senior. Comedy Skit: Hovenkamp, Sullivan, Allison Smith, Johnson]
5.5 Will Kapp - Base 6 Reality
[Hard to find someone who communicates as you do. Comedy Skit: Kapp, Ahrens]
6. Nick Brady - Oreos
[Would you rather be a monkey or an oreo? Comedy Skit: Brady, Brown, Mozena, Plattner]
7. Anne Sullivan - Taco Tuesdays
[Alarm clocks lead to journeys in Mexico. Monologue: Sullivan]
8. Will Kapp - I Got Your Call
[Author explains his character to his publisher, publisher won't have it. Serious Skit: Kapp, Plattner]
9. Caleb Brown - The Real Hoedown
[Caleb plays the hoedown on a fiddle real pretty like, makes the audience dance on stage. Musical/Interpretative Dance: Brown, Audience Members]
10. Joe Mozena - Sideways Joe Mozena
[Mozena explains the great new way of reading in a chair lying down to Sadie, she follows suit. Serio-comic skit: Mozena, Smith]
11. P-Tek - Film Fest Rap Review
[Adam rhymes his mind about his real thoughts of the films. He ain't got no butts to kiss. Rap: Protextor]
12. Emily Yoshida - You Can See the Boys Hit the Water From Here
[Diving into memories to find a lost sock. Dramatic Monologue: Yoshida]
1) Bryan Lynch - If Only...
[Wrist slitting, etc. Lynch, Dramatic Monologue.]
1.5) Shane O'Shaughnessey - I love you. I'll miss you
[Iguana's is going out of business. Let us mourn. O'Shaugnessey, Monologue.]
2) Leroy McWallace - Sweat Pants Rule
[Florida resident tells of gorillas and peanut butter. Tom Willoughby, Comedic Monologue.]
3) Cullen S. Vens - Life on Wheels
[Cripple Arie Melloncamp gets ridiculed by student. Principle joins in. Hovenkamp, Johnson, Vens, Comedic Sketch.]
4) Nick Brady - Toy Factory
[Boy wins prize in candy wrapper, goes down to the factory to see life size Hungry Hungry Hobos. Brady, Mozena, hobos. Comedic Sketch.]
4.5) William Callahan - Ancient Chinese Dynasty
[A poem about death, with blindfolds! Callahan, Kari Swanson; poetry performance]
5) One and a half random freshmen - Idaho James part 1
[A hero looks for a female in distress, gets taunted by a booming voice offstage. One and a half random freshmen. Comedic Sketch.]
6) Soheil Rezayazdi - Tree Hugger
[Late night driver annoys fellow drivers for entertainment. Rezayazdi, Seriocomic Monologue.]
6.5) Caleb Brown - Tape Buddies
[Caleb befriends a little man made out of masking tape, finds a friend with a duct tape counterpart. Brown, Mozena. Comedic Scene/musical montage.]
7) Arie Hovenkamp and Dan Kolen - Music Theory
[Arie plays with dead fetus action figures while Dan discreetly takes off his pants. Hovenkamp, Kolen, Johnson. Comedic/deeply disturbing scene.]
8) Doug and Mary Lestina - Back in the Day
[Flashback to the 80's where the couple first came to know one another. Pick up lines galore. Lestina, Lestina, Smith, Hovenkamp, Johnson. Eighties Comedic period piece.]
9) Emily Yoshida and Rebecca McCray - Il Grande Giardino di Olivio!
[A joyous gathering of the Italian at the Olive Garden. Accents so thick you could cut them with a knife. Yoshida, McCray, Tabor, Kolen, Callahan, Rezayazdi, Kapp, Hovenkamp, Ahrens. Massive Comedic Scene.]
10) Dan Hanson, Tom Willoughby, Devin Waterhouse, Bob the no shame guy - Learning by Osmosis
[Disgruntled student decides to learn himself a book via osmosis. Hanson, Willoughby, Waterhouse, Bob. Comedic Scene(s).]
11) Whitney Ringen - Ain't no one can stop me now, SUCKAZ!!
[Girl speaks of depression and the possibilities of a brighter tomorrow. Ringen, Dramatic Monologue.]
12) Kevin Plattner - I can sort of juggle 5 balls for a short time when I'm really lucky, therefore I'm infinitely more cool than you
[Kevin juggles five balls for a very short time before dropping the vast majority of them. Joe makes fun of him. Plattner, Mozena; comedic sketch]
13) Cullen S. Vens - The Gay That Is
[Observations in College Green park where the gays carouse and their dogs sniff them. Vens, comedic monologue]
14) Caleb Brown - Your Friend's Nose
[If you can, in fact, pick a person's nose, does that mean you're not friends? Let's test it! Brown, Kapp; comedic sketch]
15) Joe Mozena - Boxman
[Boy enclosed in box, taped, pushed from great height, emerges in one piece! Mozena, Brady, Brown; stupid human trick]
15.5) Erin Broderson - So this is it... ?
[Tale of a Boy who watched cars kill his cat. Over and over again. Broderson, dramatic monologue]
16) Paul Rust - I Started Writing This the Day John Lennon was Shot
[E.T., the teenage years. Stangl, Rust; comedic scene]
17) Emily Yoshida - My Favorite Month
[Standing, smoking, waiting for a ride. Yoshida, monologue]
1. Mark Johnson & Matt Mobily - Snow Day
2. Joe Mozena - Shootin' Up, Lookin' in the Mirror
3. Cullen S. Vens - If I were an American
4. Erin Broderson - I Hope This is Too Scary for You and you Run Out Screaming
5. Chris Liddell-Westefeld - The Laugh Show
5.5. Will Kapp - Base 6 Reality
6. White Cat - Laugh Haaard, It's a Long Way to the Bank
7. Bill McKenna - This is How You Yes, Shame Theatre - [not performed due to a "prank" involving a live encore of Ancient Chinese Dynasty... the lights were promptly turned off.]
8. Caleb Brown - I Have Lost my Shoes - Worldwide!
9. Tom Willoughby - How to Fish With Dynamite (Cause It's Hellaz Sweet!)
10. Will Kapp - Sammy, Johnny, & Johnny's Brother
11. sadie smith - brachydactyl dayz
12. Mark Johnson - Theme Songs to Life
13. Soheil Rezayazdi - Monologue... More Like YAWN-a-logue!
14. Anne Sullivan - These Boots
15. Devin Waterhouse - Only to Discover
16. Emily Yoshida - Mary Shelley
