| Bill |
Joe |
Melissa |
An Obtuse Love Triangle By: Aaron Galbraith There are two chairs. BILL and JOE are on stage, sitting in those chairs, holding hands MELISSA is off stage left JOE You really enjoy messing with me, don’t you? BILL (Coyly) What? JOE You knew I would take you seriously. There is no way I’m going to France with you. BILL (Pretending to be upset) Oh, bother. Pause So, how’s…everything? JOE Better. BILL No sharks on the embankment? JOE Last I checked, no. Pause BILL Thanks for coming over last night. I was going crazy. JOE I feel so guilty. BILL I think I know what you mean. Pause JOE Does that ever go away? BILL I’m not sure, I’ve never been in your shoes before. |
An Obtuse Love Triangle By: Aaron Galbraith There are two chairs. BILL and JOE are on stage, sitting in those chairs, holding hands MELISSA is off stage left JOE You really enjoy messing with me, don’t you? BILL (Coyly) What? JOE You knew I would take you seriously. There is no way I’m going to France with you. BILL (Pretending to be upset) Oh, bother. Pause So, how’s…everything? JOE Better. BILL No sharks on the embankment? JOE Last I checked, no. Pause BILL Thanks for coming over last night. I was going crazy. JOE I feel so guilty. BILL I think I know what you mean. Pause JOE Does that ever go away? BILL I’m not sure, I’ve never been in your shoes before. |
An Obtuse Love Triangle By: Aaron Galbraith There are two chairs. BILL and JOE are on stage, sitting in those chairs, holding hands MELISSA is off stage left JOE You really enjoy messing with me, don’t you? BILL (Coyly) What? JOE You knew I would take you seriously. There is no way I’m going to France with you. BILL (Pretending to be upset) Oh, bother. Pause So, how’s…everything? JOE Better. BILL No sharks on the embankment? JOE Last I checked, no. Pause BILL Thanks for coming over last night. I was going crazy. JOE I feel so guilty. BILL I think I know what you mean. Pause JOE Does that ever go away? BILL I’m not sure, I’ve never been in your shoes before. MELISSA enters |
|
JOE (Jokingly) I don’t think you’d fit. JOE grabs BILL’s foot and pulls his leg BILL pushes JOE playfully BILL My foot might fit up your ass, though. BILL wrestles JOE to the ground and sits on top of him |
JOE (Jokingly) I don’t think you’d fit. JOE grabs BILL’s foot and pulls his leg BILL pushes JOE playfully BILL My foot might fit up your ass, though. JOE wrestles BILL to the ground and sits on top of him |
JOE (Jokingly) I don’t think you’d fit. JOE grabs BILL’s foot and pulls his leg BILL pushes JOE playfully BILL My foot might fit up your ass, though. BILL and JOE make love to one another |
|
JOE You really wear me out. Pause
BILL Are you still going to tell her about us? JOE Melissa would kill me! BILL Look, you’ve got to face up to her sooner or later, Joe, before she finds out. They gather themselves and sit back down again Pause MELISSA enters |
JOE You really wear me out. Pause BILL Are you still going to tell her about us? JOE Melissa would kill me! BILL Look, you’ve got to face up to her sooner or later, Joe, before she finds out. They gather themselves and sit back down again Pause MELISSA enters |
JOE You really wear me out. Pause BILL Are you still going to tell her about us? JOE Melissa would kill me! BILL Look, you’ve got to face up to her sooner or later, Joe, before she finds out. They gather themselves and sit back down again Pause |
|
MELISSA Hey boys. BILL gets up and moves away from JOE towards MELISSA BILL Melissa! I didn’t see you come in. How are you? JOE sits down MELISSA How was the basketball game? BILL Oh, great, until I got tired halfway through and had to watch. MELISSA sits down and makes herself at home. MELISSA I went to the city today. BILL Where in the city? MELISSA Downtown. I had a fabulous time. BILL sits down JOE Did you? MELISSA Yes. Have you two been wrestling in here? It makes for quite an odor. JOE I’ll say. MELISSA With all the odor eaters and Dr. Scholl’s I’ve had to buy for you this year, we’re really going to have to pinch the pennies during this Christmas season. Why don’t we go to visit your Aunt Sue in Philadelphia? BILL Isn’t she dead? MELISSA Wouldn’t she be shocked to hear from us? Oh I haven’t talked to her in a long time. BILL (To JOE:) Didn’t you and Sue date before you met Melissa? MELISSA |
MELISSA Hey boys. BILL gets up and moves away from JOE towards MELISSA BILL Melissa! I didn’t see you come in. How are you? JOE sits down MELISSA How was the basketball game? JOE Oh, great, until I got tired halfway through and had to watch. MELISSA sits down and makes herself at home. MELISSA I went to the city today. BILL Where in the city? MELISSA Downtown. I had a fabulous time. BILL sits down JOE Did you? MELISSA Yes. Have you two been wrestling in here? It makes for quite an odor. JOE I’ll say. MELISSA With all the odor eaters and Dr. Scholl’s I’ve had to buy for you this year, we’re really going to have to pinch the pennies during this Christmas season. Why don’t we go to visit your Aunt Sue in Philadelphia? BILL Isn’t she dead? MELISSA Wouldn’t she be shocked to hear from us? Oh I haven’t talked to her in a long time. BILL (To JOE:) Didn’t you and Sue date before you met Melissa? MELISSA |
MELISSA Hey boys. BILL gets up and moves away from JOE towards MELISSA BILL Melissa! I didn’t see you come in. How are you? JOE sits down MELISSA How was the basketball game? BILL Oh, great, until I got tired halfway through and had to watch. MELISSA sits down and makes herself at home. MELISSA I went to the city today. I had a fabulous time. Did you know that they sell perfume in 72 ounce bottles now? Makes for quite an odor. I don’t know how Younkers is ever going to keep up with Penney’s during this Christmas season. Why don’t we go to visit your Aunt Sue in Philadelphia? Pause Wouldn’t she be shocked to hear from us? Oh I haven’t talked to her in a long time. Pause |
|
So what have you two been up to? JOE Just, you know, monkeying around. MELISSA Do you know who I am? BILL Look, don’t jump to any conclusions here. Who do you think you are? MELISSA Don’t you use that tone with me! Do you know who I am? |
So what have you two been up to? JOE Just, you know, monkeying around. MELISSA Is that what you call it? JOE Leave her alone Bill. BILL Look, don’t jump to any conclusions here. Who do you think you are? MELISSA Don’t you use that tone with me! Do you know who I am? |
So what have you two been up to? JOE Just, you know, monkeying around. MELISSA Don’t you use that tone with me! Do you know who I am? BILL Look, don’t jump to any conclusions here. Who do you think you are? MELISSA Leave me alone! |
|
JOE Settle down, Melissa. MELISSA Leave me alone! |
JOE Settle down, Melissa. MELISSA Leave me alone! JOE We were just monkeying around! Pause |
JOE Settle down, Melissa. MELISSA Do you know who I am? JOE Settle down Melissa. We were just monkeying around. MELISSA Is that what you call it? MELISSA exits. |
|
JOE Leave her alone, Bill. BILL Stay out of this Joe! JOE She’s my wife! BILL slaps JOE. BILL That’s it. This is over! JOE It’s over between us? Pause Bill, you’ve got some nerve leading me on like this. BILL OH GO TO HELL! JOE I WILL! JOE exits BILL I hope you die! |
JOE Leave her alone, Bill. BILL Stay out of this Joe! JOE She’s my wife! JOE slaps BILL. JOE It’s over between us! BILL That’s it? This is over? JOE Bill, you’ve got some nerve leading me on like this. BILL OH GO TO HELL! I’M LEAVING! BILL exits JOE I hope you die! |
JOE Leave her alone, Bill. BILL Stay out of this Joe! JOE She’s my wife! BILL slaps JOE. BILL That’s it. This is over! JOE It’s over between us? Pause Bill, you’ve got some nerve leading me on like this. BILL OH GO TO HELL! JOE I WILL! JOE exits BILL I hope you die! |
"An Obtuse Love Triangle" debuted April 20, 2001.Original Cast:
Bill-Neil Campbell
Joe-JC Luxton
Melissa-Tina Sherwood
Library]
