A Match Made in Mattel
By: Seth Brenneman
Lights up on Seth and a furby sitting opposite of him on the table, there are various dinning wares about, they are in a restaurant on a date
Seth:…I’m glad we got together long pause soo…How’s your father doing? Pause, startled look A basketball you say?…I didn’t know kidney stones could get that big!
Long awkward silence…Seth does a series of clicks and mouth noises to fill the silent void
Waitress walks by
Seth:..Umm…excuse me waitress, could you,…umm
She ignores him and walks by
Seth: Can you believe that?…She just blatantly ignored me!…Did you hear what I said?…I said she pause n-nevermind
Another awkward silence
Seth: You know…there’s something I have wanted to tell you for awhile now
Silence
Seth: I-I love you…Did you hear me?…I said I…pause…nevermind
Silence
Seth: concerned look…Is there something you want to tell me…Scared…What do you mean you need some time?…um-hmm…um-hmm… But I…um-hmm
Seth stands up and paces around
Seth: But…What about that time at the beach?…You said I was the best you ever had!…Shocked…What’d you mean too small!? You said It was the perfect size!…I don’t care about your ex-boyfriend!
Continues to pace
Seth: But…I always brought you to orgasm everytime!…Shocked…no…You weren’t…I won’t believe it!…You couldn’t have been faking it! It was so real!…pissed…I’ve had enough, I’m sick of this! You can take a taxi home!
Exit Seth
Seth waits for the furby to say something or just enters
Seth: hopeful…Did you call me back?…pause, then pissed as hell Pay it yourself!!!
He exits
Lights down
"A Match Made in Mattel" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR
"A Match Made in Mattel" debuted April 20, 2001.
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